L***

It captivates me, controls me, breathes in me, challenges me, embraces me, and somehow always seems to find me.
It's the one thing I can't say no to; I won't say no to; I will never deny its beauty in my life.
I long for it, at times crave it. I question it, and wonder why I have so much of it to give.
Why me, why have I always felt such a deep connection to it in some shape or form.
At times it's a blessing, and at times it's a curse. For with it brings joy and inevitably pain.
I envy those who've truly found it, and know that some day it will find me too.
I feel for others who continue to deny it because it's never going away.
I wonder if at times I search for it in the wrong ways, but then I wonder, what is the right way.
Ask anyone and you'll get a different response; for we've all encountered it in such rare, distinct forms, and these forms are only sacred and intimate to the individuals that we are, and we'll all swear that our way is the pathway to it.
So what is the "right" way, what is the "best" way. All I can say is that there is no way; it's a power far beyond our means and it has its "own way" for each and every one of us.
We see it when we're willing, we feel it when we finally choose to let our guards down, to set our pride aside, to face it full on with every inch of our being.
It makes us who we are, through the good and bad encounters we face.
Many times we struggle to find it in its genuine form, but never the less it's there.
Without it, I couldn't face one day, I wouldn't understand any part of me because it is the reason I am who I am, I do what I do, and will continue to embrace each day, each encounter, each person, each circumstance, and each challenge in my life. I want it, I need it.
What is this "IT" I speak of-What is this concept that amazes me-Why what else could it be....................